Fuck amatuer rap, I'll stick an axe in ya back
grab a scalpel from the lab n cut ya atoms in half
collapsin you flat... make me mad n get smashed bitch
stomp you so bad ya stomach ends up where ya back is
you'll be thinner than anorexics takin crack hits
lace ya brain wit acids like u ate peyote cactus
murk the name you rap wit, ya outta date wit tactics
battlin me... is like tryna pierce a tank wit hatchets
born in test tubes like orphans i was a failed abortion...
in the womb i sat in a room wit a strait jacket made of organs
wrap intestinal tubing around ya neck 'till ya blueing
squeeze until everything goes black like the end of a movie
it was hard but i managed, to find the titanic
I died, ressurected as Moses n split the Atlantic
i spit wit advantage, i was born wit ability
n formed as an ill emcee to torment the industry
i'm a force without sympathy, a man without pity
spit winds high enough to disaster a city
go to hollywood and find the actor theyre filming
Rig a bomb to the frame so it collapses the building
an assassin for killing, my silence is lethal
you rappers cant see me like outside of peepholes
im tired of people who try to be peaceful
im the type of emcee who likes to be violent and evil
i crush skulls, get hot enough to melt the north pole
Intoxicated's spittin heat like i swallowed the sun whole
Lucifer couldnt do that if he choked on hot coals
After i burn out, i'll go to the after-life to hunt souls
where i'll be fighting a hord of cults till my sword is dull
barely escapin with my life through an opened portal hole
return to the mortal world and continue my conquest
To be the illest emcee in the world without contest
To blaze mics throughout any region of the globe
assaulting ya ears till there's blood leaking down ya lobes
come up and put you in the sleeper while you choke
it's death sneakin up on you, i'm the Reaper in a cloak





Ummm that's all i'm gonna do for right now... tell me how it's going and take into consideration that this will be my first audio.... just a first draft, appreciate any feedback...

__________________
Intoxicated vs .iLL.
Intoxicated vs John

Ripped: Cata_Strophix, Optimus, Luminary Text

hit me up wit some feedback

__________________
Intoxicated vs .iLL.
Intoxicated vs John

Ripped: Cata_Strophix, Optimus, Luminary Text

Nice shit dawg..lots of multies in this
Which made it flow good in my opinion
You had lots of quotables too
very nice wordplay...keep it up..
Should be a dope audio

Uppin for some more feed

__________________
Intoxicated vs .iLL.
Intoxicated vs John

Ripped: Cata_Strophix, Optimus, Luminary Text

Stop sleeping... give me some feedback please...

__________________
Intoxicated vs .iLL.
Intoxicated vs John

Ripped: Cata_Strophix, Optimus, Luminary Text

do i have to have a specific user name to get feedback here??

__________________
Intoxicated vs .iLL.
Intoxicated vs John

Ripped: Cata_Strophix, Optimus, Luminary Text

not bad..not bad at all...you had few good quoteables in here..and nice use of multis..good flow..and this would probaly sound alot better in audio..nice work...peace..

See.... Giving Feedback Isnt As Hard It Seems.... Perhaps Someone Else Would Like To Try It??

Thanks Pen

__________________
Intoxicated vs .iLL.
Intoxicated vs John

Ripped: Cata_Strophix, Optimus, Luminary Text

Yeah i agree this would sound pretty good in audio.....the flow to it seemed real good, flowed pretty smooth through out the piece....had nice multies in there, which made the flow real good....overall a nice piece...keep at it.

Thanks man.... Any more??

__________________
Intoxicated vs .iLL.
Intoxicated vs John

Ripped: Cata_Strophix, Optimus, Luminary Text