this is my first ever song, please holler back and tell me if its good or bad. cheers.

The entire world is a surreal void
Swear to god I should speak to Freud
Thought life was here to be enjoyed
But society got it all destroyed

It aint no secret that the youth are misguided
And that is the truth don’t try to hide it
And if you don’t know the reasons behind it
Your entire perspective is lop-sided
We aint got nutin to live for’
Ready to Die, kicking in ya door
Volatile like a pile of C4
Don’t wanna fight your war or live your life
Don’t want ur strife cities in chaos
The violence is rife forced in to gettin a knife
For protection, some turn to injections
Look at society’s twisted perfection
Some bullshit always got us stressing
And u think we care bout sum dam election?

The entire world is a surreal void
Swear to god I should speak to Freud
Thought life was here to be enjoyed
But society got it all destroyed

*Attention Please! *
This is a public service announcement
Pissed off with your life? Then denounce it
We’ve become serial materialists
That shit takes u over like bacteria’s
Linin the pockets of those imperialists
Y’all call me a conspiracy theorist
But I gotta tell u im so dam serious
Bush and bin Ladens ties, u neva hearing this
In the media, don’t u think that’s mysterious?
I’ve heard sum shit that cud fuck up ur mind
But u don’t wanna hear it u wanna unwind
Never mind the fate of mankind
Ignorance and evil are intertwined
If you aint the solution then u and the problem combined

The entire world is a surreal void
Swear to god I should speak to Freud
Thought life was here to be enjoyed
But society got it all destroyed

This was ok. The only problem was that your rhyme scheme was so simplistic. unwind/ur mind/man kind/intertwined....the piece was a good one...just work on a more creative rhyme scheme..it was straight for a first song..
Don’t wanna fight your war or live your life
Don’t want ur strife cities in chaos
The violence is rife forced in to gettin a knife
For protection, some turn to injections
Look at society’s twisted perfection

^I liked that..and btw, I care about the election.

Return the Favor..Image by me..

-Word

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Im dope. You're not.