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Old 03-08-05, 07:20 PM   #1
Lil Mark
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Posts: 17
Joined: Oct 2004
From: Kentucky
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a sample of my song called I cant be stop

IP: 41F3 0D0A

Can't be stop I wont be stop//
untill I reach to the top//
I can go in any hood cause I aint no flip flop//
my least favorite hobie is running from the cops//
but you can find me at tha ammunition shop//
it sounds like two country's is battling//
because of tha way my trunk is really rattling//
im short but I keep it gangsta you can tell by tha way my pants is sagging//
but im still a kid so I keep on laser tagging//
my jewelry keeps on shining but I dont mean to be bragging//
hate people on keeping talking but I speacially hate them girls that keep on nagging//
everytime I speak my words keep flowing//
im still on top even though I aint growning//
thug life is tha only thing im knowing//
and greatness is tha only thing im showing//
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Old 03-08-05, 09:09 PM   #2
The Militant
www.militantmusic.com
 
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Posts: 1,542
Joined: Aug 2004
From: SAN DIEGO,KILLAFORNIA
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IP: CBD1 4982

ight first of ya flow and structre are horrible rhymes were'nt that good either up ur vocab ur lines are way to strecthed make em like
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something like that....read around other peoples open mics and u'll get what im sayin better...do some wordplay ask around for some more advice orya can hit me up in a private messeage and ill help ya out some moreor u cna go to the emergency help center and look aroud there and that'll help u good luck man...return the feedback in one of my open mics in my signutare....peace
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