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| Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio  |
11-14-05, 07:51 AM
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#1
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Middle Weight
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Kisses
IP: 11AF 50EC
Once again i had to jump into another mind.....enjoy.
Kisses is what they call me, but that’s not what I'm known for
Any fast paced song reminds me of my night life Similar to Clark Kent, once I change clothes I’m a whole nother person Legs automatically wrapping around poles, tricks turned faster than the record being played He says if I bounce dat ass fast enough that ill bet that bill A 9-5 aint what’s really for me… Just knowing that my smooth brown skin causes a twinkle in every mans eye Spot light hits and I get nervous every time the warmth covers my body And every dollar that’s strapped to my thigh I know wasn’t hard to earn Dirty money spends just like clean Each Friday and Saturday you can find me where the music pumps like the body’s lively fluids Protrude through the streets like word of mouth You will learn… Kisses is what they call me, but that’s not what I’m known for. http://community.rapverse.com/showt...d=1#post2537364 http://community.rapverse.com/showt...d=1#post2537365 Last edited by Lil C : 11-16-05 at 07:47 AM. |
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11-15-05, 12:03 PM
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#2
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Middle Weight
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IP: 11AF 50EC
def want some feed on dis one guyz...............damn dont sleep on it
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11-15-05, 02:47 PM
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#3
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Light Weight
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IP: 5285 DC82
*gets lubricant*
ahahah this is a good read.. diffrent approach to what im used to reading in poetry...i think that could be why I liked it..... Try having a more repeaditive structure..rather than line length switch ups and syllable changes... good read
__________________
DIRTY RECORDS
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11-16-05, 07:46 AM
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#4
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Middle Weight
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IP: 11AF 50EC
thanx fo da feed cdusit....yea imma re-do dis one here in a bit
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11-30-05, 02:28 PM
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#5
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New to RV
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IP: D4FA A3B8
ya i agree its diffrent but good,and ya you need repetitveness a lil ........... Nicce thou
keep it up i like the change... |
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11-30-05, 04:44 PM
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#6
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Cuz I'm Old Skool Baby
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IP: 042E 9E4C
for real girl i love ur style. Ur a very modern writer and have a lot to offer. unalways appraoch poems from a whole other perspective and leave food for thot for the reader. well done girl.
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This is my sig. what? I'm white so u KNOW i can't rap =) I will definitely RTF if u leave a link, thanks! |
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12-07-05, 07:34 AM
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#7
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Middle Weight
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IP: 11AF 50EC
wow thanx fo da feed guyz...forgot bout dis one lol
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