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Old 12-04-05, 02:38 PM   #1
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*Untriumphant*
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This is for Spoken Def =D
All Done By Me
Beat: Wu-Tang - Triumph

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Old 12-04-05, 02:39 PM   #2
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Old 12-04-05, 02:52 PM   #3
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Listening...

Beat sounds cool...

Wow...dont use that echo thing in your verses...

Your flow is all over the place...in the first verse anyway...hook is wack...no offense...second verse had better flow...

Quality was lacking...overall, you need to keep elevating man...keep working on it.
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Old 12-04-05, 03:11 PM   #4
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hook's flow is ALL over the place don't use the echo like LE said quality is pretty assed out...but thats the mic not you...beats nice concept is great but yeah jus quality pretty much lyrics was iight but yeah this one of your best
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Old 12-04-05, 03:25 PM   #5
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lmfao @ the singing. never do that again unless your not gonna pause all the time, you you sing you gotta be like Untriumphant.......! you got keep sayin it as it was a bigger word or w/e but anyway this is better you got better, quality needs work I still hear them pops. but takin that sock off worked I guess. the verse was short and you still pause to much, keep rappin man, pace yourself and keep spittin dont pause and shit. write them bars longer or somin.

anyway not bad man 1.
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Old 12-04-05, 07:18 PM   #6
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not feeling this flow was some of the worst i heard but better than ur past songs mic is shitty lol and i cant understand alot of what ur saying cause of the accent ok track not feeling the sounds you added lol
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Old 12-05-05, 10:50 AM   #7
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beats nice...lose the echo if you want effects like that on ya voice use a reverb...effected ya flow as well...quite choppy...needs improvement...boo @ ya main page saying your the next best thing from the UK...care to prove it? lol
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Old 12-05-05, 02:38 PM   #8
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Yeah Dont Use The Echo

Flows Off..Bit Choppy

Ahh@The Hooks Flow

2nd Verse

Flows Wayyyyy Betterr Lol

Qualitys Ass Tho Lol...:/

Lol @ The Arr Thing Sounds Like A Duck

Yeah

Delivery Was Aight

Presence Is Better

You Def. Elevatin Keep At It Dude

You'll Get There

Overall:6.5/10

Keep Up

Rtf Here Plz:http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=216320
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Old 12-11-05, 02:45 PM   #9
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uppin for some more help!
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Old 12-11-05, 06:06 PM   #10
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wow...this beat again


I don't like the echo on ur vocals


tough to make out what you're rapping

not feelin the hook


too many pauses in your delivery of the hook...


work on vocal editing/mixing

flow isn't all that bad though


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