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Old 04-11-08, 09:28 PM   #1
D523
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keystyle, peep itt

IP: FB71 7584

Best believe my flows insane
Listen to it and itll make you numb like novacaine
Try and run up on me and ill blow your brain
And if you talkin shit, you obviously aint sober mayne
We all know you should’ve thought before you spoke my name
But I’ll make your girl wet like shes soaked in rain
Burn your house down, and spark a blunt in open flames
It aint a joke, nobody wants to croak in pain
And if your boys want it let em all know the same
But I can see they eyes sayin I hope hes playin
LIfes never a dead end, but an open lane
And everybody has their sport, just know the game
So fuck all you haters, just grab a rope and hang
Ill catch all you later, and I wont be tame
Your number 2 like pencils, We winners
Beat me? You must be outta your tree
scream timber!
Im a king at this thing you just beginners
What I spits so hot, you just see embers
Lets just see how I take your girls legs
And get in the middle like a referee
Its official, this the new blazin ballad
So much piff broken up looks like a plate of salad
Bring your girl home, and turn the slut backwards
Im the exorcist and you faggits just casper










Did this fairly quick to the Neck of my woods beat by Lil wayne and Birdman, if you rap it to the beat starting at 0:12 it goes perfectly.


Comments highly appreciated



D's backkk
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Old 04-11-08, 09:36 PM   #2
D523
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Old 04-12-08, 01:08 AM   #3
Ysdat
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this is ok at best. Its really simple bro, nothing stood out to me like, "damn, this kids dope"

I had to think twice about closing it as its on the level of somthing that should be posted in 'cyphers keystyle' But ill leave it open for the fuck of it.

The metas in this are weak as fuck. "Ill leave your girl wet like shes soaked in rain' basically a no brainer there.

You need to try get alot more technical in your writing, cause this is simple and not good at all.

Real talk.
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Old 05-08-08, 11:21 PM   #4
_Talksic_
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real simple, extend your vocabulary,and work on being a little more creative.
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Old 05-09-08, 11:47 AM   #5
XM
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....i don't really like keystyles....

...particularly serves no purpose, but its ok at best, attempted punchlines were basic not really feel'n much of it i guess. well record it and then post it other then that no point in really feeding a verse to an audio that well....isn't audio
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Old 05-11-08, 06:09 PM   #6
Charisma
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It was on some elemtary type shit with the vocab and that salad line was wack, it was average, I wasnt blown away by it but I wasnt saying, "this guy is wack"
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