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Topic...
Reaping the benefits

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mic check can you hear me????? Checking in lets make the third a good one Pledge.. 100 characters long............

lol a had a feeling that mad man would try to pull something like this off..aight his sounds like a good topic so gimmie time just started work

Gazing down from above he stands
Small tiny silver orbs clasped tightly in his hand
gently he places them down on the earth
waves his palms on the small particles and gives them birth
proudly he watches over his small creations
watching them change colour and create different nations
He had created the perfect universe for his litte children
And after all he hd done for him he thought this wouldnt happen
people we no longer nice to each other always bitchin
he watched as the cave men came and went with the revolutions
as swords came on the scene piercing into his precious creatures
killing meat for fun or food with a perilous nature
but then his worst fear came true
man discovered guns
and without a dobt he knew
people would kill just for fun
all the times that he missed out on signs this was occuring
to busy bein big headed to notice the world was hurtin
*why was i so blind as to not see the hurt*
*i gave them everytyhing they needed...out of the love in my heart*


One boy named michael who was innocent and pure
fell to the ground in a pool of blood..and knocked on Gods door
although god was sadly disheartend he still answered his call
he took one look at michael whos eyes showed the earth fall
God asked the little boy how he got to this stage
and when god heard his decree his soul filled up with rage
an eleven year old boy caught up in a shooting spree
this innocent youngster killed...all becuase of me
all because of what i made and all i have created
some worship me every day but in other's lifes im hated
God fell to the round and started to cry
the little boy put a hand on his shoulder..divinity shone throughh his eyes
Please god dont cry theres one thing you should kno
no matter how hard you tried sir.....you reap what you sow

these people are evil but you had no idea
now theres no cure but heart ache and tears
just because you created them dont mean your responsbile
some people are really lovely..others downright horrible
athough while you sat here reapin the benefits of a erfect world
you were too blind to notice hate and evil unfurl
but do not cry over it get up and start again
because after that cruel world dwn there....we come here..to heaven

black coats and gentle pokes release all your fear
the end to all your toture will never draw near

Concluding events presents itself in the cold
Forclosuer subdued the present mold

Needing to burn like the fires that surround
peice by peice you hit the solid ground

Bloody nexus tentalazing times
Clocks passing the blinding unwines

Jiberous always makes no sense and crazy lights the fire
I came from another reality to heal you with desire

Angel wings grace your face as tears burns your lips
Crystal eyes glare at your from your finger tips

Hatred took over your soul and pleasure stole your frustation
It took only one to be segregated from the revalation


~May the Angel of Death spare his wrath on the people for the truth is never known...........~

There wings were torn with blood dripping down
Never to realise they lost there crown

Symtoms of praise fell to the earth
A new angel had been given birth

Cursed to live a life of sorrow
To never know what will happen on morrow

coutship fades and dreams of happiness grow fonder
Needing a love, he could fight no longer

beneath the shelter the cold grew thin
Air filtered the quickness from within

blessed with glory his life was for death
He took there souls when he took there breath

To live they had to die and die they did
Aquiped without a heart he could still a kid

Night after night he crept through your homes
And night after night he left you feeling alone

happiness through rage and death through the light
Longful sorrow made everything feel unright

He choose this path when he left the gates, he forgot his passport back
He didn't check his benefits or for what he might lack

all you have to do is walk through the fire
Respect what you give up to desire

Revalations spoke of Genesis the beggining of the Universe
What it forgot was the Angel who died for a curse

White Reaping the Benefits he forgot about the future
Lost hours of hatred created him to be a creature

Stuck in the night with blood shed in the day
Remind every child they dont want to live this way

Born unto another son he might get another chance
One long last look at this death avalache

Crusified for his sins he bares a mark of deciet
Burning down below and hung by his feet

He prefers it that way so he might have another awakening
tortured for his passion, his benefits still sinking

Beneath the shelter the cold grew thin
Air filtered the quickness from within

Blessed with glory his life was for death
He took there souls when he took there breath

Night after night he crept through your homes
And night after night he left you feeling alone

Happiness through rage and death through the light
Longful sorrow made everything feel unright

He choose this path when he left the gates, he forgot his passport back
He didn't check his benefits or for what he might lack

All you have to do is walk through the fire
Respect what you give up to desire

Revalations spoke of Genesis the beggining of the Universe
What it forgot was the Angel who died for a curse

While "Reaping the Benefits" he forgot about the future
Lost hours of hatred created him to be a creature

Stuck in the night with blood shed in the day
Remind every child they dont want to live this way

Born unto another son he might get another chance
One long last look at this death avalache

Crusified for his sins he bares a mark of deciet
Burning down below and hung by his feet

He prefers it that way so he might have another awakening
Tortured for his passion, his benefits still sinking

Close battle, both enjoyable to read, but imma have to go wid pledge, she had a few dodgy rhymes in their but so did Angelic, Panthers had more heart and depth, even though Angelic used some interesting worplay. I also daint like Angelic's repetitive touch at the end, all in all though one dope battle, but im afriad it was pledge who jus edged it. Well done you two.

vote=pledge

O the reason I edited it was because It was a little too long... but yea, there is a much much much longer version of it out there ....

ok this might seem like a crew vote but im voting on the real here....

pledge, i liked the idea of having it like when god was making the earth...beautiful imagery

Angelic- I wasnt really lfeeling yours, and I didnt like the format (That held no bearing in my decision)...not bad vocab and imagery but Pledge pulledit out

vote= Pledgeofpanther

vote=pledge
angelic...your verse was really good, and it had dope vocab and a nice concept, but a lot of it seemed to lack substance.
It talked about all this very poetic stuff that didn't seem to have much meaning.
pledge...I wasn't feeling you until the little boy line "you reap what you sow" I re-read it all after that and it was so much better.
That line clinched it for pledge.
Peace

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Life isn't a bitch...
she's just sick of being personified -Sage Francis

thanks guys 3-0 uppin.......nice battle angelic...we both rose to the challenge........100 characters

yea yea yea yackity yack yack...... not that I'm being a bad sport but if you can't understand what I wrote then you need to read the bible.... but since I'm not a bad sport I kind of felt pledges also... it was good imagery..but it was simple also... Maybe i'm too complex.. lol... nice battle though.. OoNnEe Love

yeah pleadge won this for me
verse had more meaning in it and was enjoyable to read even though im not religious at all
other girl ur verse was nice but if u had meaning behind ur good imagery and vocab etc it would be dope
nice work though

To me Angelic was Much deeper ...and i mean alot deeper...type of stuff u have to read more than once.but still the point didnt come much too clearer to me.maybe if she would have set a story behind it it would have made a little more sense to me.......Notcie how i said to me....

Pledge was just simple and straight to the point i liked hers alot better because it was just what it was........a story told..kinda very flowery type but I still liked it.....

so to that i give this one to

vote=Pledge

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MerK SquAd.

<center><img src=http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/attachment.php?attachmentid=8889&stc=1></center>

cool battle. . topic-flippage (new term) could have been a bit more abundant, but other than that, it was a competitive match-up.

Pledge: The story and symbolism it possesses was the only thing that seperated you from your opponent, but it was so extreme that it won you the battle. Work on polishing your punctuation and vocabulary, because delivery is key in topicals. .

Angelic: Unfortunately, I am not an avid reader/worshipper of the Bible. You showed the definite capacity to write some intelligent, thought-provoking topicals. But, before beginning the actual writing of your piece, I suggest you brainstorm a few ideas. . This will easily provide you with the topics necessary to advance your originality and creativity.

Good luck to both in the future, but in this case, I vote for pledgeofpanther.

I can't poll vote due to a bug in RB's system. . MM, add a vote for the recipient of my written explanation.

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