Sometimes I feed I dont get the respect I deserve,I get so obsurd with these twist and curves that I go berserk cuz of this jerk, and take my life and bury myself in the dirt

Sometimes I only work on elevation, I take no hesistation to go to my station and lead like adminstration cuz people still dont give each other respect like it was still black and white segregation

Sometimes U dont understand what life is, is us kids or what adults do in show biz, They shows us how to live, like we already dont take life to the highest bid, and still show them what life really is

Sometimes Im disgusted the rulez are laid, Parents say"You gets got it made", but little do they know, when we grow into more generations like Alien Invades, and come up with inventions and win 1st place at science conventions

Sometimes I want attention, instead get detention, I just want everyone to hear me, but get hated cuz Im smart and different, Is it something Im missin?

Sometimes the world is so full of insults with hurtin words exchangin like gettin struck with a thousand volts, now I have no pulse, my minds jolts..and still not being heard like bein sealed with nuts and bolts

Sometimes I dont want to get hurt no more, whats my life for? To sit around and do nothyn and die cuz I was bored, I speak my mind but noone hears me like a lion with no roar,I implore as I explore for new doors to go through, but only come to Dead Ends sealed with super glue

Sometimes I hate people who dont want to succeed, what your life needs is a postive mind to just to achieve and believe, in dis world theres to much greed, which we should not keep and give to the need

Sometimes I wish the world will change, it wont, it'll stay the same like being born with one name, People think war is the only element, havin peace on earth is like havin a black president

Sometimes I wish there was less crimes, people dying each day in less than no time, People have no choice but to rob, when a gun to your head askin if you believe in god, like robbery is the only job

Sometimes hatred fills my gauge in so many ways I feel like I wanna end my dayz, Like bein trapped in a sound-proof cage, cuz noone hears me anyway, Lifes full of stages of intricate phases but I only feed on my surroundings of my mental basis, just cuz paper cant incase this

that was a good drop...had good word play flow was pretty good i'd day, good read peace

__________________
Open Mics
The Weathers Art
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=108673
My Teenage Eyes
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...threadid=104850
Secluded
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...851#post1148851
Open Your Eyes
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...461#post1157461

you use a lot of multies... and at points it looked to me like some of them were forced in there to keep the flow goin... just work a that a lil and you gon' be good mang...
A.T.

thanx for the feedback...but there were not forced....You talkin to a vet kid...

That's some pretty good shit there and good with the multies. Keep droppin and layin them punches. I like this. Check out my piece, "She's gone now," and hit that up with some feedback.

Good shit man.

Laaate.

thamnx..uppin on this...!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!

could i get some feedback plz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

u had a good vocab, nice concept

thanx more feedback!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!