this is off the top..........


In the darkness of night, evil never hides.
Can you hear the screams, hear the cries.
See the red eyes?
They can not die.
They can not feel pain and never sorrow.
Neither a lender nor ever a borrow.
Creep out slowly with the dieing light.
Never seen the day and never feel fright.
You may say you won't but I think I might.
Have a taste of this dark, dark night.
Feel the rage and violence so strong.
Now I know where I belong.
Close your eyes and I might be there.
Tingles down your spine and its not your hair.
Its me oh my.
Its darkness time.
I'll make you bleed, and wish for death.
It won't come that swift, I'll squeeze your breath.
When I'm all done they will say its suicide.
Nobody will know, it's like I never lied.

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<BR><h3><color=black><center><MARQUEE BEHAVIOR=scroll DIRECTION=left LOOP=infinite scrollamount=1 width=300>*~*~*Lady Wun*~*~*</MARQUEE></color></center></h3>
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<BR><MARQUEE BEHAVIOR=scroll DIRECTION=up LOOP=infinite scrollamount=1 height=100> <center><font color=000000><I>*~*~*~*~*</p>I'm invisible to the unseen eye</p>I'm undeniable strength</p>*~*~*~*~*~*</p>Merk Squad</MARQUEE></center><I>

hmmmm this piece has me thinking, coz im not all sure i know for sure what you are talking or refering about.

it seemed more to be telling a story then venting emotions, which is awsome too, more of like a horror story i suppose

at the beginning the rhyming seemed a bit much but it toned down some after the first few lines, didnt seem as forced.

the flow well i think all the peroids threw me off some, because usualy a peroid is at the end of soemthing, and thats where you stop a sec before you move on, it did work in some places but not all, maybe you intended it that way thou, to try to give it more of a just read throu piece, dunno.

~Tera~
DONT HATE

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Great piece for writing off your head. Was worth the read. Full of emotion and feelings. Keep it up.

MM

im not sure what it was about either but it was clean, nice vocab, simple structure, well laid out, nice story off tha top though, nice piece girl, keep droppin.~1~

umm did u mean never lived?

well good poem......

strong words, and yeah it prolly got ppl thinkin

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