Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio |
11-24-03, 10:07 PM | #1 | |||
is back...
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Death's Shadow... Past 1...
IP: A092 9E01
Ever walk through Death's shadow..?
We enter the story... with Bribeone... BribeOne1: To get to the other side - I had to get past this guys shadow. I swam accross darkness, that only giants see shallow. Follow the smiles of the waitin, and leave behind cries of goodbye. whats the reason we have to meet this guy, right before we die. I try to not make a sound, cause ill b a goner if I'm found. Ill creep behind his shadow......... hoping that he doesnt turn around. his breath of decay exhaled through cavities dusty in agony. trumpets strike the wind with death tones played in harmony. he stares at where its coming from- bloody eyes face the horizon. wings of dark feathers spread as the rotten body starts risin. I was crouched down with a chill of fear, running down my back. when all of a sudden the room filled with light, at last the end of that. "they brought him back" were the screams I heard that were distant. if he turned around and didnt drive........I wouldnt b here this instant. Doctor: Go to sleep... You'll need your rest... Bribe: I sure will... that shit won't be forgotten... *Bribe falls asleep as the memory of yesterday plays out in his mind...* Avalon: upon leaving the club... flickered the lights upon street corners, up above breathing on thugs... glimmered faces who grieved for us... our footsteps n' laughs from 4 alleys behind multiplied 4 times them, and 4 figures appeared... as 4 sure we dead right around then... the moon hid behind it's own shadow... stellar helps practical, for what it's worth in battle... Av n' Bribe were in it to help our selves... now this is the situation... everytime I step another 5 steps are heard, one's Bribe's... my heart's pacin... n' Av's life said no words... ok let's step up the pace... no ruger cocked... and beef can't wait, no car to unlock... we walked... dumb ass... Bribe's feelin the race... like Donavon Baley... maybe Donna's betrayed me, the steps are nearer, can't get clearer... make a left down 79th... guess death can't get realer... "Bribe stop" as I turn around looking... no one seen... no one's there, "Damn that was close dunny..." almost thought we got caught... "Here... I got a little present for you..." as four dudes tackled the soldier, as Av stands over... You ever walk through death's shadow..!? *POP* (Bribe wakes in a cold sweat) "Gasp" *nurses rush in to check on him* The Reckoning... Part 2... Coming soon... |
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11-24-03, 10:16 PM | #2 | |||
is back...
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IP: A092 9E01
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...3649#post933649 My Flow the insane clown
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...3635#post933635 Corrupted Visions Restricted http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...3625#post933625 The Final Kiss... 13th Apostle...^by far the best... |
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11-24-03, 10:25 PM | #3 | |||||||
ShO-Nuff. Fuckers
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IP: 399E F0FD
heres My ThrEe..
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=94116 http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=93490 http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=93367
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MerK SquAd. <center><img src=http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/attachment.php?attachmentid=8889&stc=1></center> |
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11-25-03, 05:53 AM | #4 | |||||||
ShO-Nuff. Fuckers
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IP: 4577 CD9A
u are all bunch of sleeping mofos
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MerK SquAd. <center><img src=http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/attachment.php?attachmentid=8889&stc=1></center> |
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11-25-03, 01:31 PM | #5 | |||||||
New to RB
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IP: DC4B D8F1
FUCK YOU X 100......wat U tryin ta do? kill me.....U should've said dis was poetry muthafucka.....am a street soulja...can't deal wit dese 'cotton candy' bullshyt!!......FUCK U
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Bringin FAKE ass niggaz da 'Business' |
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11-25-03, 02:48 PM | #6 | |||
is back...
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IP: C4FD 7309
^ he's stepping in front of the line to get roasted... lol... that's great...
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11-25-03, 05:45 PM | #7 | |||||||
ShO-Nuff. Fuckers
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IP: C1DA C961
Shhh..we're not supposed to see him hes very darrrrrrrrk
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MerK SquAd. <center><img src=http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/attachment.php?attachmentid=8889&stc=1></center> |
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11-25-03, 06:31 PM | #8 | ||||||
Guest
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IP: B1A9 7F81
This was different from i've read so far which i like.
Bribe's flow was more put together Av's was choppy and in some points didnt really make sense. but i did see the story and it made sense. the strong arm was Bribe he was pretty much the glue of the post. Av's verse kinda brought it down. i just thought he should of thought it out a bit more. but overall it was a C-minus you guys get 5.5/10 Peace.... 1............. |
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11-26-03, 06:29 AM | #9 | |||||||
ShO-Nuff. Fuckers
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IP: 4577 CD9A
up
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MerK SquAd. <center><img src=http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/attachment.php?attachmentid=8889&stc=1></center> |
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11-27-03, 11:53 PM | #10 | ||||||
Guest
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IP: E088 113D
this was pretty niice
bribe had a nicer verse with more imagry and flow avalons was a lil choppy but it was still pretty nice |
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11-28-03, 12:21 AM | #11 | |||||
AKA Cereal Shelf
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IP: 6E65 1B29
Bribe came dope as hell in this.. I was really feelin the opener alot, nice wordplay, you sorta fell off in the middle but quickly picked back up. The flow was on for most of it. The topic was nice and you worked well with it.. Props.
Av your was decent, flow was off majorly, but I was feelin the lines and wordplay. You came confusing at parts, but I liked this collab. 8/10. Reply to Me and G Hods collab. http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...2694#post942694
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<center>Deja Vu ..Remember These Dope Kids?.. .................................................. . Last edited by Aisle 5 : 11-28-03 at 12:29 AM. |
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11-28-03, 12:42 AM | #12 | ||||||
Guest
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IP: C415 5965
that was Tight Kuz....kepp that shit droppin....that had a nyce drop on it.....nyce collab.....it was done well....not much u need work on.........good shit guys keep it goin....allround i enjoyed the read 9/10 for it ....... Peace Out Kuz
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