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Old 01-03-04, 09:31 PM   #1
Cinderella
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Echoing Goodbye

IP: 9ECF 685B

My boyfriend and I were fighting last night. This inspired me to write the following:

The ground outside starts to shake
But my heart beats faster in it's wake
Following our fight came a rush of pain
Tears stain my cheeks like the ground after it rains
When the storm has passed the whole Earth is smiling
But the silence of my heart is even more blinding
My body lies limp and ragged on the floor
Reading Welcome so that I can be stepped on once more
A loud clap of thunder rings through my ears
Echoing Goodbye and confirming my fears
The wind carried you away, but you can look back to the start
I will always lead you home with the blinding silence of my heart

Last edited by Cinderella : 01-03-04 at 11:34 PM.
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Old 01-03-04, 11:33 PM   #2
self
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I'm sowwee.


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Old 01-05-04, 09:16 AM   #3
Tourniquet
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Not sure I should interrupt what seems to be a 'private moment'.. but pfft, I will anyway because I want to tell you this is beautifully written. Using the thunder and rain, and writing them synonymous with the argument you had, your life, your tears, is just stunning. I breezed through the entire piece, didnt hit one speedbump in the flow. The rhyming wasnt forced at all, it seemed natural the entire way through. Effortless even.

Most times, its when we are emotionally messed up that the best 'stuff' just pours out... I know thats where my muse works its creative magic on me, when I am at my lowest.. which unfortunately means that when Im happy I cant write (which drives me crazy) so I look for.. err.. certain substances that will provide what I describe as 'simulated depression' haha.
Anyway enough dribble from me..

Beautiful write. Hope everything worked out
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