Ok... A few things you could do to improve your compilation would be to add a alot more multies.... dont stray off topic so much, instead delve deeper into it.

A few plus's... your flow wasnt bad at all, your vocab wasnt misused, and your structure was on point.

Like I said in the first sentence, those two things will REALLY improve your writing technique and fan base.

Peace.

RTF to something in my sig. (preferably a battle)

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Blow It - Topical