K, or Lyric perhaps? Nice writing style.
Even so though, this was not a great piece. You had so much more potential to do something great with this. The outline was there but your concept needed work. I think you needed to find a new approach to writing this piece and it just didn't happen, sorry bud... wasn't feeling it too much. That's crazy how it's a true story though... Fucked up world.........
Pz
http://community.rapverse.com/showt...305#post2670305