Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio |
|
08-06-04, 06:30 PM | #1 | ||
New to RV
|
Oliver Twist....Twisted
IP:
Once Again, I'm new here...and i'm not really down for open mics...but I havn't found out how ya'll do the battles around here so I'll drop another quick key for ya to critic and lemme know what ya think......
Twisted into a million thoughts of wonder when they fester I'll come humble with this lecture.... And let ya'll know I don't crumble under pressure Your kids need the content..the scholars insist Haters can hate and the ballers get pissed 'Cus I've been lived the streets..the rap Oliver Twist Fuck a video..call me the lyrical technition I'm a broken promise un full filled like kid's who just kept wishin' For another chance and a better way of life But the cost is high so someone better change the price Freedom..just a word as emcees we need balance We'd all die to be high up like kings you see the palace?.. Or can you see the critical aspect of this rhyme Basterds take your time.... Because i'll devour in 1 second what takes ya 60 minutes time I diminish all kinds..of emcees I feel no remorse You can't just study an enemy if you don't have no resource So I'm forced to pour coarse language to better you And it's not a question why I made it big homie instead of you Sad but true....we can't all be the next shit They say evrything bigger down south.so you should just move to texas Check the check list...the best is when ya kno you got what it takes to beat all odds and put out the best in a tape Some live hip hop..other's profession is rape but prison cells and court rooms put the best things at stake This is heavy but listen I'm not new to the cause They say I shine bright but i guess the proofs in the stars... ok done..just a li'l key style maybe a 15 minute i think....but check it out and leave some critic..i'm always tryna find out if people dig it or whats up......2 |
||
08-06-04, 06:58 PM | #2 | ||
New to RV
|
IP:
rise this..........2
|
||
08-06-04, 07:31 PM | #3 | |
fuck da hataz B.A.M 4 life
|
IP:
good flow n wordplay liked it nice drop peep my new shit wit emergin 2 new callabo's peae n holla back nigga 1 luv
__________________
VOTE IN THESE SLEPT ON BATTLES N ILL RETURN DA FAVOR WIT HONEST VOTES |
|
08-06-04, 07:38 PM | #4 | ||
New to RV
|
IP:
no doubt man..i'll peep it ............2
__________________
Oliver Twist |
||
08-06-04, 07:40 PM | #5 | ||
Bonecrushing Nigga
|
IP:
nice shit man
good structure nice flow good creativity nice imagery keep up the good shit
__________________
Guess who?... ...Paramik Fuckin'...
...Owns You! ||RVS Text Champion||
|
||
08-06-04, 07:48 PM | #6 | ||
New to RV
|
IP:
no doubt thanks man........2
__________________
Oliver Twist |
||
08-07-04, 03:29 PM | #7 | ||
New to RV
|
IP:
rise this..............2
__________________
Oliver Twist |
||
08-07-04, 06:48 PM | #8 | ||
New to RB
|
IP:
good flow and wordplay...good job
|
||
08-08-04, 01:07 AM | #9 | ||
New to RV
|
IP:
word...ty man..............2
__________________
Oliver Twist |
||
08-08-04, 03:20 AM | #10 | ||
Banned: Cheating
|
IP:
yo oliva i liked yo shit dawg i felt ya, nice wordplay but evrythin cud elevate jus keep gettin betta but nice piece, n yea peep does collabos, iite 1 love
|
||
08-08-04, 03:24 AM | #11 | ||
New to RV
|
IP:
yeah..i'll make sure i peep them...thanx tho for that crictic..........2
__________________
Oliver Twist |
||
08-08-04, 03:54 AM | #12 | ||
Banned: Cheating
|
IP:
shit dawg no problem keep postin new shit
|
||
08-08-04, 01:15 PM | #13 | ||
New to RV
|
IP:
no doubt..i will............2
__________________
Oliver Twist |
||
08-09-04, 01:10 PM | #14 | ||
New to RV
|
IP:
can i get some more critic?.........2
__________________
Oliver Twist |
||
08-09-04, 01:25 PM | #15 | ||
New to RV
|
IP:
I like your style but your flow is off quite a bit. Try to keep all your bars the same syllable length. Still not bad lyrically. Keep em comin, also wat ya think of my verse Death Wish?????
__________________
~Wrekless You know the rappers these days that snap then breeze ways// In the opposite direction of the gat that he says// He'll cap, if you aint on in don't say you are// before someone engraves a scar on your inflated arse// Site Record- Wins:0 Losses:0 |
||
Thread Tools | Search this Thread |
Display Modes | |
|
|