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inside
IP: D0CB 44B2
inside my body I feel hate and despair
im always like fuck you i dont care my mind is feild with demonds trien to get out somthins in my rymes i just wanna scream and shout my life has been like a burning place(hell) I can feel the flames all up on my face Poeple dyin my mama cryin stilli cheatin lyin you think thats bqad im definin my life ' just pain and strife I go to school get in a fight then i come home and get on this site this site makes me feel like im at home atleast i dont feel like im alone! |
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IP: F845 C337
basic rhyme scheme.. basic structure... basic emotion.. this was overall basic. too short, spellcheck. I wasn't feelin this.. it was aiight though... peep otha peoples shit n drop some crit. No hate.
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<center>Fuck it...</center> |
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IP: 3DEF 9A9C
It was ok. Overall as Angel said it was kidna basic. Nothin special. yea u had ure emotions there but in poetry you cant think too hard. just let it come to you and write it down. all about expression. But the only way to get better is to keep spittin.
Overall Grade: 5/10 |
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IP: C1DA C961
^agreed with ill and ayngel. However, like they said it was good. Just remember to let ur emotions and thoughts flow and kinda free like <technical terms>
Overall, I liked it. Basic and short, but u got ur point across. thats wut counts. Keep em comin. Much respect |
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