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Old 05-25-05, 09:26 AM   #1
DQ
Odi et Amo
 
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Mother Earth's Fury

IP: C9A2 1C80

Mother Earth's Fury



Staring out of window covered by tiny raindrops falling from sky
Thirsty flowers absorbing their water supply as dark clouds cry
Greenest grass reviving … print my footsteps in the wet fertile soil
Glistening rain as protection foil, so much beauty I wish not to spoil
Soaked brownish locks clinging to my skin as I now start to spin
Silently watching mystery of nature, waiting for blossom to begin
When suddenly I feel moist lips on my neck, blending in with rain
Lost in the moment, going insane as blood rushes through my vein
.
.
.

Holding each other tightly as the rain gradually converts to snow
Phenomenon landscape has to undergo, creating pure white glow
Dribbling flakes hiding nature’s glory, turning cruel world to heaven
We fall down, start to roll around like back in day we were eleven
So playfully teasing in this winter wonderland we learned to adore
Laying in innocence’s core for these crystal acres we’ve explored
So many times before yet still enthralled by beauty of Mother Earth
The almighty giver of birth whose majesty we humans aren’t worth
.
.
.

But then she displays unbearable fury as clouds start to thicken
Falling at an atrocious pace, causing us to be grievously stricken
Thrown around by ravaging wind, seeking for him as I get blinded
Helpless victim of our own planet, of our mortality we are reminded
Salty tears mixing with rain and snow, ruining this idyllic scene
Once oh so serene sight changed to a demolition I’ve never seen
Floods of a dangerous blend streaming down from heaven's gates
Destroying a love without one trace, steering our inescapable fates

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Old 05-25-05, 09:28 AM   #2
DQ
Odi et Amo
 
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...The future is mine...

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Old 05-25-05, 04:53 PM   #3
atti?
1926
 
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Wooooooow, That Was Beautiful...
The Emotion And Imagery Were Both Amazing...
You Had Everything Else Too But The Those Were Beyond Rv...

I Love Your Style Of Writing...
You Have The Skill To Write And Comete With The Men...
Yet You Somehow Have This Femininity About Your Writing...
You Write The Way A Woman WOULD See Something...

I Dont Meen To Be Sexist...
But Its Just There, Its Not Bad...
You Put A Womans Essence Into Ever Word...
It Really Is Truely Unique And Amazing...
Stay Up Fem...
.One.
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Old 05-25-05, 04:57 PM   #4
Murdah.txt
Get Stomped.
 
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yeah this was a dope drop i pictured every line good vocab and flow dope drop keep doin ya thang girl and return tha favour on one of tha links in my sig
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Old 05-25-05, 05:02 PM   #5
Kawn Flixx
FUCK STROBE
 
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This was ahot drop...i was really feeling it
Structure was on point.. Feeling adnd emotions..
Were on point... You had nice imagery.. i was really feeling this
Peice.. it was amazing ... you had nice wordplay and vocab
i liked your style of written , This was a very good job from
a women , not to be sexist but it was good , and im feeling it
Nice drop ma , keep it up
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Old 05-25-05, 05:15 PM   #6
DQ
Odi et Amo
 
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Whoa, thanks for all the feed...I will return it tomorrow!
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Old 05-26-05, 11:29 AM   #7
DQ
Odi et Amo
 
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*bounces in*

Bumpity Bump Bump

*bounces out*
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Old 05-26-05, 01:10 PM   #9
¤ÐÅž¤
leave you rest'n pz's
 
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nice ending, i liked the majority of the piece
i felt the wording was a bit off in parts n it
didnt quite deliver your content to its fullest
but i only found this in a couple bars gurl...
this was quite the piece, good length...
vocab was there, but i only got one queery
did you mean phenominal landscape..?
its just phenomenon didnt quite flow
properly in my opinion.....stay up drama..[thumbsup]
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i'll play on ya consience, ya contents is complete nonsense
speak of biting, then you fucks flip everyone of my damn concepts
what the fuck, was you high..?
did you think i wouldn't recognize lines that i made
then you come up some bullshit tryna prove that im gay...!
.
.
fake fucks..move on...!
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Old 05-26-05, 01:33 PM   #10
Ma$fit
Cus I Jus Ma$fit Dis Shit
 
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dis is whats up...real talk right here...pictured all bars and it kept me interested...i knew dis was fiya when i saw u wrote it (not to seem like im a "pussy/titty rider" but its true, lol)...stay up ma and do what u do how u do it when u do it and be what u are when u are and how u are...*random*...9/10...real talk
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Old 05-26-05, 03:43 PM   #11
DQ
Odi et Amo
 
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Thanks for feed people! I will return favor as soon as possible...
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Old 05-27-05, 02:03 AM   #12
47.29" of Zigs
my alliance is with ganja
 
47.29
 
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nice nice nice super fucking dope never knew what all the calamoring over ya skillz was your pretty ogood

rtf
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kings
concidering that i've got compliments from girls off of rv from that pic makes me wonder where your pictures are.....

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Oh and lk I got a serious question 2 ask u baby from me 2u. Will u marry me and be my wife, and the mother of my kids and all?

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Old 05-27-05, 11:22 AM   #13
DQ
Odi et Amo
 
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Thanks for feed...
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Old 05-27-05, 11:32 AM   #14
EsKalayde
this time, lets just pretend ur as good as me...
 
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I like this peice...this is slick yo...like rockin pimp suits at a ball u feel me...real nice...imageryon point,flow,structure...ur really good at writing...follow ur dreams u heard me...
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I've broken fingers, broken toes, hyper extended my elbow, broken my
ankle, torn ligaments in my ankle, cracked my head open numerous times,
gashed my legs, arms, and fingers severly.....all from skateboarding or
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DAYUM!!.....................DAMN!!................ .........did I say damn?




im just that gangsta...
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Old 05-27-05, 12:44 PM   #15
Germ
in your system
 
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this was really cool....vivid imagery, i was really liking the way i could picture everyline....and strong emotion, which you are best at, i think.....overall, this was pretty a pretty awesome read, the intro line just made a great start, good stuff DQ, keep up
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