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Old 07-21-05, 01:18 AM   #1
Kawn Flixx
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Hell To Heaven's Advice Ft Paranoid

IP: 0AE0 3B1A

Paranoid
Living so strife, my visions and wishes always Vanish
Yet I can convert, making myself a victim to Banish
Even Christ has opinions, everyone’s destined to Shine
A veteran of greatness, I wonder what best been Fine
Such lethal rareness, such people with good Awareness
To many knew the fair in this, unable to fall Apart
Lisping and shuddering, always perfects its Decision
Such aggressions, most believe in they’re own Vision
A perfect mentality, may improve your Personality
The final chance, while you glance for Immortality
You may find arguments, such a disappointing Dispute
Hectic living, yet Christ shines for his final Salute
Such A generic personification, it ranks lights Power
Every hour of time, I’m so fierce I begin to Devour..
Any minute of motion, horrid pictures of Commotion
Yet I fight to shine, with Christ its my Promotion



BoneCollector
From the day ive come out from my moms Womb..I never was protected by light..
God was never there for me ..I loved being in the dark.. and wondering at night..
I was always a bad kid from the start following and admiring the wrong friends..
From the day i copped that gat back..and fired at my enemy in that black benz..
I never was the same...people looked at me different ..and looked at me bad..
But i gained a rep that..i loved to have..but sooner or later that rep was all i had
My Family had given up on me..and just simple said"do wat you want im done"
Only thing that i could turn to now was the streets and thats were my story begun..
I started to get stressed out..not having anyone to turn to,only thing i had was drugs.
I would use it to confert me and take away my stress..it was all i had while living w/ thugs
Rolling 20 deep everywhere i would go......i would feel like i had my nucca's everywhere..
The day they find you strolling solo..the'll take your rep and even take the things you wear
Then you go back to your hood bruised and blooded your people rush and ask wat craccin?
Before I could begin my story they loaded there gats and strolled to where i had once been..
I lead the pack to tell the ones who had hurt me ..that your about to get knocked out..
As soon as we see them my ppl attack an ina split second the ppl lay dead without a doubt
Then we see flashes of light... and the cops pop out of every direction.. i flee the scene..
But my people stayed they were trapped and from that day on my crew were never seen..
Now I live on the streets no family to go home to..some people might think thats the life..
But always looking behind your back for enemy's and always strolling the hood with a knife..
Its the life i wanna live...but i do


http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=201008
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=199214
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Old 07-21-05, 01:40 AM   #2
Paranoid
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tight shit

uppin ay.
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Old 07-21-05, 03:35 PM   #4
Axel.
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Congrats to both of yall, I was really feelin this.

Boner: You had a tight verse, imagiry was on point, wordplay was sounded nice not great but not bad at all, the structure hm...was kinda stretched work on not stretching your lines and youll be fine, rhyme shceme was fine so i could flow to it..

Good Job !..

Parinoid.: I liked you verse a little more maybe just cause your more expierecnced.Rhyme sheme was great had some good multis in there, some were kinve foced but not noticible, nothing else i can really say you both did great !!!
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Old 07-22-05, 11:34 AM   #5
Kawn Flixx
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Upping This Thanx
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Old 07-22-05, 11:40 AM   #6
Christianite
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this was good, both did a good job, really felt both parts, again props on this really good read, keep it up you 2
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Old 07-22-05, 02:57 PM   #7
Willa
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props to both of u u had good imagery and vocab flwo was pretty tight lookin forward to more drops by u 2
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Old 07-23-05, 11:25 AM   #9
Kawn Flixx
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Bump....to the top again!
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Old 09-06-05, 03:15 PM   #10
SINISTER
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Excellent Pice, I loved it and shout out to my man paranoid, your on fire homie....Keep it up and concider doing that again you guys really put some good work into this......

~Sinnister
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Old 09-06-05, 11:38 PM   #11
Willa
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paranoid vocab lacked in this peice but ive seen mad better from you your structure and flow were good
bone again your structure lol your vocab and imagery that i get when i read your verses are amazingg if only you could make your bars like half the size they are youd be great but props that stuff is easy to imrpove
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Old 09-16-05, 02:59 PM   #12
SINISTER
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This shit was on fire...... This was some good ish.... Keep it up,
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