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11-24-03, 09:04 PM | #1 | ||||
Straight Savage.
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Son Of The Mourning
IP: 8BEC CACE
I look outside, and What do I see?
You tell me, As I speak, your here with me I see things of great proportion the Devil's package drops and when it lands, it brings upon explosion and leaves not a trace of life I see a person, walking down Wall St. With Satan's Smile And another person forced to go bankrupt I read, books of pain written in text, but with missteps no novel is perfect,and a perfect book isn't a novel I turn a page, and I'm amazed, The book got me startled Lucifer presents light to those who come near THen closes his jaws on people, who he brings upon fear and darkness overcomes the light its getting cold they find their reciept on hell's hard floor I can't sleep, the stories unfold, Im in too deep Satan, the son of the mourning And I see the sun in the East.
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Only God can judge me, Who THE FUCK IS YOU?! |
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11-24-03, 09:53 PM | #2 | ||||||
Guest
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IP: D111 F954
damn--i was deffinately feelin that shit, wit out a doubt--ive been tryin to get into some more deep shit and this shit is real im deff feellin it...i like the name too
keep it up homie UnO |
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11-25-03, 02:41 PM | #3 | ||||
Straight Savage.
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IP: 8BEC CACE
^
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Only God can judge me, Who THE FUCK IS YOU?! |
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11-25-03, 08:01 PM | #4 | |||||||
"Cuz bruk said so"
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IP: F005 00C3
Structure was a bit uneven, not enough to disrupt the flow, but enough to be noticed. I'm not sure, you might have done this for reasons. I enjoyed reading this one, but for some reason i wanted to read more. Ryhme scheme was simple, could have used some twist and such. Topic, really nice, I wouldn't have guessed what your drop was about without reading the entire thing. Some peolpe are just too predictable, not this though. Other than the minor things I tried to point out here there is not much I would do to this. Keep them coming, it's nice to see you taking advantage fo the scriptures thread.
Bounce...
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FUCKA BABYLON BANDIT!!! |
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11-25-03, 10:25 PM | #5 | |||||||
Str8 From CopKilla Queens
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IP: C1DA C961
This shit was on another level, i was deeply feeling just the way it seemed like concentrated rambling, it was deep and profound yet easy to understand, it felt as if i were unlocking the answer to the most thought puzzling question i had ever been asked, respect...1luv.
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11-26-03, 03:31 AM | #6 | |||||||
Atra Ludio or Hip-Hop?
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IP: 1A6F 5237
Hm... bouncedoggydog pretty much summed up the technical aspect, so aint nothing there for me to say.
As for the peice itself, it befuddles me. Assuming that's a word. I guess I'm perplexed by it's meaning. I can understand the whole Lucifer consuming people thing, but that's about it. Something tells me there is more to it. Hm... ~Shalom~ |
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11-27-03, 01:16 AM | #7 | ||||||
̣
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IP: CEF5 716F
i agree it was very unique
i injoyed reading this piece a lot |
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12-16-03, 04:43 PM | #8 | ||||||
Guest
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check this out
IP: CBE9 1590
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12-16-03, 04:49 PM | #9 | ||||
Straight Savage.
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IP: 8BEC CACE
^WTF?
__________________
Only God can judge me, Who THE FUCK IS YOU?! |
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12-16-03, 04:59 PM | #10 | ||||||
Guest
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IP: B20F 67F7
sites down give it awhile
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12-16-03, 05:52 PM | #11 | ||||
Straight Savage.
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IP: 8BEC CACE
^What the fuck is it?
__________________
Only God can judge me, Who THE FUCK IS YOU?! |
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12-16-03, 08:17 PM | #12 | |||||||
"Cuz bruk said so"
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IP: F005 00C3
I think it's a bands web site skidz!
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FUCKA BABYLON BANDIT!!! |
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12-16-03, 08:29 PM | #13 | ||||||
Guest
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IP: CBE9 1590
if the content of quite amazing poem interested you in anyway, then I recommend this site. I promise it isnt any fucked up religious type god bothering shit.
nor is it as deep and profound (in most part) its just right it is a band site, but it is also an important one It is mint as fuck lads SALFORD POWER |
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12-17-03, 07:46 PM | #14 | |||||||
Registered User
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IP: 785F 1F17
i really like this poem..everything i would say was pretty well summed up by the other replies but one thing i would like to add is this kinda thing IS SO TRUE... i love the way ur visions were so clear to us readers and its a wake up call to reality i like this man aint got much to say on workdetails caws i personally like it just like this...keep this up..
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my head is clouded with senseless doubt but this seems to be my only escape route so ill slither my way across the ground to avoid my blyndedsoul from being found ~*~YOU LIVE YOU LEARN~*~ |
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12-17-03, 09:08 PM | #15 | ||||||
Guest
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IP: C149 8644
i had to read this a couple of times.......it was a good drop....some real deep shit....................i liked
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