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Old 02-03-04, 03:45 PM   #1
Jacent
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Childhood: Allegory & Jacent

IP: C1DA C961

Allegory

High flying and making my time as a child
Days wild, those were the times when it never seemed mild
Rebel in my own right I fought for independence
Dad's amendments, however, left my frantic fits endless
In my little struggle for equality I was like Rev. King
Jus let me sing, cause back then teen rights was the thing
A knock at the door, it might have been my boy Jacent
Hit or miss, that's the way we played it with bliss
Whether I was expressing artistic talent or hanging wit my clique
Life was a trick, a prank, a joke, a gag, and a comedy flick
From innocence to jail sentence was a regular occurrence
steering past currents was everyone's dream's reference
But what the fuck, who cares, the rule was don't get caught
changes fought, and these same methods are still taught
Rap might have saved me from ending up a careless person
Caught cursing in 6th grade, the plot would only worsen
Suspended eight times in total from my days of school
Thought it was cool, I bragged about it like a fool
Caught cutting more times than a paper shredder
Another letter, home to my dad that would never
Reach him, cause I always checked the mail first
My mind was immersed in the bible of sin headfirst
And what was worst was I couldn't get out
I would shout to myself when alone, and let my demon clout
My mind was in shambles now, and forever that would stay
Time may stray, but I lived it once, now live it all day
The thug life is a part of me, my young life brought it on
Just a pawn, maneuvered to the point where sanity is gone




Jacent
A virgin mind, so young & innocent
..At weight with the lord, in peace with him
The backyard, my castle of joy
..A young boy, fascinated w/ ninja turtle toys
Collections of memories, grandpas face
..It was so perfect, nothing I could ever replace
Walks to the park, Cunningham Lake
..Fishing with uncle Terry, just so great
One thing though, I'll never forget in that time
..is grandpa, ur gone but images still lurk in mind
Playing, grandma calls me in for lunch
..I guess its true, you only get to live childhood once
I wish I could go back, nights of beauty
..Slowly, time progressed & childhood began to lose me
Everyone got older, mature, & changes took place
..Teenage trend crept, fell into the pack of race
My youth wasn't bad, it was far from it
..Living in rough areas is stereotype, but it wasnt
It was fun, I'd trade anything to go back in time
..& see myself, As a youthful virgin mind
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Old 02-03-04, 04:00 PM   #2
Daz
So Tired Of It.
 
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From: Hiphopscenes.com
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IP: 4577 CD9A

this was aight...i'll adress each personally

Allegory- your verse was ok..the flow wasnt always on point here..some the of the wordage in here coulda been more complex to enhance some of the imagery..still the simpleness of this verse is directly in comparison to the sweet delicasy and simplicity that is childhood..so in all said..nice verse man keep droppin...

Jacent-nice verse to..the flow was also off on this seemed to me..i think you brought up some memories from my own self which in turn made me go back to think of what you were saying..the grandpa point was very true...and part of the reason i liked this is because you brought out that stereotype that most people define in living in a rough area...also that castle in ur backyard thing...yes...relates alot for every child considers this backyard the domain in which they can express their own selves and view on whatever they feel..all that to say....nice verse....

-Daz
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Old 02-03-04, 04:07 PM   #3
Jacent
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IP: C1DA C961

thanks for the feedback daz...i hate to up..but can we get some responses plz...thanks
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