i seriously adore the lyrics of this track,the beat is ill,only the quality

www.soundclick.com/xspitty

so here are the lyrics:

sometime i just wished that i never had born
its maybe sunny outside but inside its a storm
you could never understand the way i feel
if you want too,just be stressed,fear and never come clear
look at the atmosphere,its about as ugly that it is between my ears
¸its all fuckep up,only bad souvenir,
cuz you know,teres always someone tere to put you down like i queer
but friends are tere tu cheer you up and create some tears
i wished i was a robot,no emotions,nothing to panic about
only directions,and never bad things coming out of my mouth
but if you one day you think about suicide
id be ready to help you and wip those tears from your eyes
you dont need no disguise,your beautiful and it aint no surprise
and i guaranteed it for life

...................................

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upping this so i could elevate

fuck people i think deserve feedback im the one whos almost giving the most feedback these days

im feelin this beat for an emotional type track, some nice lyrics on paper..... but ur voice is alil messed up..... canadian right? im sure itll sound fine there, juss for me its alil weird... ur quality is ok pop and click wise..... but it sounds like wen u were rappin that u were movin closer to the mic at some parts, and farther apart on others, cuz the volume varies alot word to word..... also just work on pronouncin ur words alil better.... flow was on for the most part, there was one lil mess up, but thats nothin another record take wont fix....

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...The real Renegade before Hova...

iight thanks...

one feed....thanks for fux,much respect,i gave enough feedback on songs and nothing?

Here's some feed: your voice is strange as hell and the lyrics are worn. It's just one big cliche.

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lol is that something good

Your voice you can't help, so whatever. But your rhymes are horrible, that's what I'm saying. It's all been said before (only better). Try to rhyme three, four, five syallables at a time. And put some meaning into it that hasn't been done by some stupid ass emo kid.

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iight thanks ..

I see your rocking the necro beat... aight

well one thing for the end of the beat... you might want to fade it out next time instead of just having it cut off aight,

definatly need some better quality, and flow was off a couple timeskeep up your game bro, and when you write your lyrical content make sure you have enough time to say every word during ur bar so that u ain't rushing during your performance... in some lines you had a little bit too much in one line...


keep up the wriitting bro ... keep recording you can only progress, so aim for the top

Draxe

peace

thx for the feed