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| Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio  |
06-06-05, 10:52 AM
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#1
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Banned: For Being So Fly.....lol....my new account is Triple Sixes....
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Pain and Suffering
IP: 473F 6D42
Pain and Suffering
I feel a great discomfort in my mind, it is very serious The acutely unpleasant physical discomfort I experience Takes me to certain limits I can’t withstand with all my powers Mind burning, cells destroyed, can explode like volcanoes in any hour The pain why do I have to suffer from this… was this fate? Want to escape the pain; I want to get out the narrowed gate The hole is too small for me to fit but can I jump? Still the pain in my mind figures out that I’m dumb More suffering can come even if I try to leave it Cells in me comes through my body so it bleeds it Out of me, but I can still experience pain there’s no change So vivid u can actually see the bloody words even on the page No band-aids can stop the bleeding, I just must endure No healing, no therapy, no remedy there’s merely no cure Still pain and suffering can come back so its better just kept Even how difficult it is to swallow the bitter pill and accept
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  STARTING 2MORROW I WILL BE TRIPLE SIXES THATS GON BE MY NEW ACCOUNT SO THATS ME AIGHT CUZ IM SO FLY......LOL |
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06-06-05, 10:54 AM
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#2
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Banned: For Being So Fly.....lol....my new account is Triple Sixes....
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IP: 473F 6D42
Links-
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=194010 http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=193683
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STARTING 2MORROW I WILL BE TRIPLE SIXES THATS GON BE MY NEW ACCOUNT SO THATS ME AIGHT CUZ IM SO FLY......LOL |
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06-06-05, 02:40 PM
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#3
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Champion
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IP: A342 417C
Yo man u got real hot flow man....imagery great...sentence structure...try use more word play and multies....
ut of me, but I can still experience pain there’s no change So vivid u can actually see the bloody words even on the page No band-aids can stop the bleeding, I just must endure No healing, no therapy, no remedy there’s merely no cure Still pain and suffering can come back so its better just kept Even how difficult it is to swallow the bitter pill and accept best bit.....7.5/10....return the favor....to my OM "Let Loose"...peaceee...~1~
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www.soundclick.com/dollaback
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06-06-05, 02:45 PM
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#4
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Odi et Amo
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IP: C9A2 1C80
Liked this piece in fact, nice concept you worked out here. Managed to portray a clear image of the scene, of the pain and suffering. Emotion was strong aspect as well, vocab was on point and flow was good, structure's cool.
I can't wait to read more from you because this the first thing I have read and so far I like your style 
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Authentik Intelligence  ...The future is mine... |
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06-06-05, 07:02 PM
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#5
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Banned: For Being So Fly.....lol....my new account is Triple Sixes....
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IP: 473F 6D42
thnx for the comments above pplz thnx u alot i will leave feedback on yall OM's 2morrow thnx u
uppin this
__________________
STARTING 2MORROW I WILL BE TRIPLE SIXES THATS GON BE MY NEW ACCOUNT SO THATS ME AIGHT CUZ IM SO FLY......LOL |
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06-07-05, 05:31 PM
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#6
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Banned: For Being So Fly.....lol....my new account is Triple Sixes....
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IP: 473F 6D42
uppin for more feedback pplz plz thnx in advance
__________________
STARTING 2MORROW I WILL BE TRIPLE SIXES THATS GON BE MY NEW ACCOUNT SO THATS ME AIGHT CUZ IM SO FLY......LOL |
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06-07-05, 09:24 PM
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#7
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Banned: For Being So Fly.....lol....my new account is Triple Sixes....
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IP: 473F 6D42
uppin cmon pplz askin for more feed aight stop sleepin
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STARTING 2MORROW I WILL BE TRIPLE SIXES THATS GON BE MY NEW ACCOUNT SO THATS ME AIGHT CUZ IM SO FLY......LOL |
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06-08-05, 07:00 AM
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#8
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Banned: For Being So Fly.....lol....my new account is Triple Sixes....
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IP: 473F 6D42
uppin this plz leave feed
__________________
STARTING 2MORROW I WILL BE TRIPLE SIXES THATS GON BE MY NEW ACCOUNT SO THATS ME AIGHT CUZ IM SO FLY......LOL |
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06-08-05, 05:53 PM
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#9
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Banned: For Being So Fly.....lol....my new account is Triple Sixes....
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IP: 473F 6D42
yo uppin this man plz leave feedback ok pplz cmon stop sleepin
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STARTING 2MORROW I WILL BE TRIPLE SIXES THATS GON BE MY NEW ACCOUNT SO THATS ME AIGHT CUZ IM SO FLY......LOL |
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06-09-05, 01:39 PM
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#10
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Banned: For Being So Fly.....lol....my new account is Triple Sixes....
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IP: 473F 6D42
nobody leaves feed uppin this again for feedback
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STARTING 2MORROW I WILL BE TRIPLE SIXES THATS GON BE MY NEW ACCOUNT SO THATS ME AIGHT CUZ IM SO FLY......LOL |
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06-10-05, 03:04 AM
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#12
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New to RV
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IP: E555 11CF
blah blah blah... too many dudes on your dick....
content was good.. thats a plus.. your one word 2 syllable endings made for really boring reading.. guess it wasnt the greatest thing ive ever read.. just needs to be more complex for it to be to my liking..
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06-10-05, 08:07 AM
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#13
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Banned: For Being So Fly.....lol....my new account is Triple Sixes....
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IP: 473F 6D42
^^ok and u are?^^
TM thnx for the feedback but leave more lines cmon man what a respponse well uppin this for some good feedback ok
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STARTING 2MORROW I WILL BE TRIPLE SIXES THATS GON BE MY NEW ACCOUNT SO THATS ME AIGHT CUZ IM SO FLY......LOL |
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06-11-05, 05:30 PM
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#14
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Banned: For Being So Fly.....lol....my new account is Triple Sixes....
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IP: 473F 6D42
upppin this lets get some feed
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STARTING 2MORROW I WILL BE TRIPLE SIXES THATS GON BE MY NEW ACCOUNT SO THATS ME AIGHT CUZ IM SO FLY......LOL |
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