Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio |
05-29-03, 03:51 AM | #1 | ||||||
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see what i need? got help?
IP: BFEA 8F82
ayo i listen to all my music before my rymes is all written//
tryin to extend my lines and hyro dry all my gliphics// when i post a line and freestyle off the head// my lines past thru the matrix and end up as the lead// my chambers inside my heart, pump twice as fast thru my head// im always open armed for critics tellin me of my flaws// i'll still hold on my grind incase a nigga wanna pull out and draw// YO......CRITICS ACCEPTED!!!!!!! FEEL OR NOT |
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05-29-03, 04:09 AM | #2 | ||||||
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IP: 3971 6458
yo demise, pretty nice man, expanding your vocab would help ALOT tho, and ..my chambers inside my heart, pump twice as fast thru my head//??? did'nt get that as i've been smokin a bit,, all good tho, keep elevating cuz!!!!
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05-29-03, 04:14 AM | #3 | ||||||
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IP: BFEA 8F82
AIGHT SON....THANX YO.....THAT LINE I DROPED...MEANS...MY HEART IS RATHER NOT MY ACTUAL HEART IN MY CHEST, BUT ACTUALLY MY HEAD.....THATS MY MAIN HEART
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05-29-03, 04:37 AM | #4 | ||||||
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IP: 3971 6458
ohhhh i feel ya, then shit....it was better than i thought! keep it up man.
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05-29-03, 12:17 PM | #5 | |||||||
Retired.
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IP: E48D 38F6
yep you need to work on vocab
Kind of a simplistic flow as well... work on branching out a lengthening those lines somewhat... I'd suggest trying your hand at cypher for awhile then working up to an open mic. |
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05-29-03, 03:31 PM | #6 | ||||||
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IP: A619 75AB
up your vocab...keep it coming though
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06-02-03, 03:10 AM | #7 | |||||||
. Doper Than You.
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IP: 399E F0FD
Demise, U Need To Extend Your Vocabulary Extremely.....And Also Need To Extend Your Wordplay Dramatically.....your Piece Was Mediocre.....Add Some Multi's And Some Punches, then See How U Like It....
I Know U WIll......Pz |
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06-02-03, 04:54 AM | #8 | |||||||
...Fuck With That!
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IP: 5213 E7F8
i suggest you read some verses from some of the vets... check out elite front lines and rb legends for examples of good verses. Study them and learn from them
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