RapVerse.com Community
 Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End RV Radio  

Go Back   RapVerse.com Community > Fresh From The Lab > Textual Releases
User Name
Password
FAQ Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 09-23-03, 06:00 PM   #1
A.T.
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
New Style!!!!!!!!! Please Check!

IP: 3340 B04F

aiyo...
I'm just your average cat known to blast lyrical gats with grandly planned tactics,
only at whack mc's, hood rats and avid crack addicts that try beefin back at me.
I was sent to cut up and destruct any rhyme scheme you could conduct,
I leave you bent outta shape like fat people losing weight and still blowin up any verse you construct.
My record shows "one" and "O" but I dunno why my win percentage aint larger.
I'm steadily hittin targets from quarter miles and leave yall gradually behind me gettin farther...
Aint nobody harder, aint nobody smarter, when battlin me, it would be in your best intrest to bring a partner,
Cause my verbal grenades bring down crews tryin to do the same,
I'm lyrically insane... fuck this open mic, I done forgot to pack my brain, yo................

lol


hit me up wit some feed back... this is my new style... I need input.
A.T.
  Reply With Quote
Old 09-23-03, 10:47 PM   #2
gotaloveforrap
Banned for being stupid
 
gotaloveforrap's Avatar
 
Posts: 497
Joined: Sep 2003
From: Phoenix, AZ
Status: Offline
Text Record: 3-0
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 0420 0878

i thought that post was hella good. i think the new style is tight and keep postin wit it. anyway back to the post, the vocab and wordplay were good. the content and topic were original. keep postin wit that new style i was feelin it.

yo can u return the favor with my post?
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=81167
thanx

peace.....
Send a message via AIM to gotaloveforrap Send a message via Yahoo to gotaloveforrap   Reply With Quote
Old 09-24-03, 06:08 AM   #3
N.D.eva
BANNED: Cheater
 
Posts: 246
Joined: Sep 2003
From: N.E. England......
Status: Offline
Text Record: 3-4
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 6F9E F23B

ya new style is tight , it seems to flow good

"My record shows "one" and "O" but I dunno why my win percentage aint larger.
I'm steadily hittin targets from quarter miles and leave yall gradually behind me gettin farther...
Aint nobody harder, aint nobody smarter, when battlin me, it would be in your best intrest to bring a partner,"

like the way you brought these lines in talkin bout ya battle record

keep the stlye.......ill keep checkin ya flo...................aight
Send a message via AIM to N.D.eva   Reply With Quote
Old 09-24-03, 08:01 AM   #4
Biasi
New to RB
 
Posts: 25
Joined: Sep 2003
Status: Offline
Text Record: 0-0
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 9B91 D0C6

Very nice imagery/ wordplay, good rhyme scheme

nice start:

I'm just your average cat known to blast lyrical gats with grandly planned tactics,
only at whack mc's, hood rats and avid crack addicts that try beefin back at me.

nice flow to the whole thing too

Cant really think of criticisms due to fact that im a newbie and the difference in culture (UK US), EG: Because you from US i know shit bout ur culture

but cant fault the lyrical structure, wordplay etc, all good


http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=81442

Last edited by Biasi : 09-24-03 at 08:06 AM.
  Reply With Quote
Old 09-24-03, 12:14 PM   #5
A.T.
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 01A3 7C2E

aight... thanx for the feed.

STILL UPPIN!!!!!!!
  Reply With Quote
Old 09-24-03, 12:55 PM   #6
A.T.
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 01A3 7C2E

UPPIN!!!!!
  Reply With Quote
Old 09-24-03, 05:53 PM   #7
Fatal D
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 690B 80D9

yo that sit was a tight little rhyme. nice new style
keep it postin
....................D
  Reply With Quote
Old 09-25-03, 01:17 AM   #8
A.T.
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 3340 B04F

thanx for the props... can anyone tell me how to IMPROVE it though... that was the main reason for posting it. lol ;p
  Reply With Quote
Old 09-25-03, 02:38 AM   #9
MonStar
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 103B C99E

i like the new style. vocab was nice and it flowed well. started out really well.

I'm steadily hittin targets from quarter miles and leave yall gradually behind me gettin farther...
Aint nobody harder, aint nobody smarter, when battlin me, it would be in your best intrest to bring a partner,

really liked ^

all i can say is stick with it and try and drop something a lil longer. i would like to see more of your new style. dont really have anything negative to say, keep dropping.
  Reply With Quote
Old 09-25-03, 02:47 AM   #10
Menik
Word.
 
Menik's Avatar
 
Posts: 2,017
Joined: Aug 2003
From: Mifflinburg, PA
Status: Offline
IP: 9C1E 2B43

Yeah this peice was good, it was a good read i thought, Your vocab was good, and the peice flowed pretty good too, wordplay was good as well, overall id say it was a good peice, keep dropping, and if you get the chance drop some feedback in my peice called "losing hope" thanks.
Send a message via AIM to Menik Send a message via MSN to Menik   Reply With Quote
Old 09-25-03, 10:50 AM   #11
Hellbound
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Joined:
Status:
Text Record: 0-1
Audio Record: 0-0
Graphics Record: 0-0
IP: 690B 80D9

....yo dats dope
....good rhythim
....try doing suming longer may then itll b easier to c a weakness in it

...props
  Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 05:38 AM.

Powered by vBulletin.
Copyright © 2000-2004 Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.