Many nights spent thinking along with wondering/
As night feeds into day I think about you while slumbering/
Thoughts of us thoughts of two thoughts of me thoughts of you/
What to do with these feelings I possess for thine true/
I do not do anything without having a remembrance/
Your stuck on my mind like a painting done by Rembrandt/
Just like him you are the best with your desires/
But my desires stem from you leaving me with all nighters/
Up all night plotting and planning of ways to speak/
To try and get your attention while still staying bleek/
Not showing you too much in fear of rejection/
Looking at you puts up a stop sign at my hearts intersection/
Not knowing me but me knowing about you so deeply/
I want more dreams of you at night..So i seek sleep/

nice piece

was good read really easy to follow alright vocab and structure

some lines didn't work but overall it was a good verse

nice peace, flowed well and was ez 4 me to follow. Keep elavatin peace

its extremely short & it was mad lackin of substance in the beginnin, but towards the end u did pull it out, nice emotion, flow was kinda fucked.. especially midway, but overall its not bad @ all

Not showing you too much in fear of rejection/
Looking at you puts up a stop sign at my hearts intersection/
Not knowing me but me knowing about you so deeply/
I want more dreams of you at night..So i seek sleep/

^ nicely done, thas my fav. part, its a great finish, good tie in with the title

Not a bad writing. Kind of simple. A topic like this that gets written about often could have had more to it, I thought. Parts of it didn't really go together..like you were trying to force a rhyme or something. I dunno what it was. That was only for a couple of the lines though. Most of it I liked. I felt what you were saying in it.

"Up all night plotting and planning of ways to speak/
To try and get your attention"

I'm in that situation right now so I smiled when I read those lines.

"Not showing you too much in fear of rejection/"

That line shows how I been in the past few days. I liked reading that one.

The more I read this, the more I liked it. Pretty good. Keep posting.